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Miss Outdoor Life During the talent portion of this Maryland pageant, contestants skin muskrats. On a sliding hotness scale, that ranks somewhere between cellulite and varicose veins.
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Miss Klingon Empire Beauty Pageant She might look like a horrifying battle ax to you, but all the guys at the Star Trek convention were asking for her number.
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Miss Gothic You won't find a spray tan or an evening dress that isn't black at this gloomy beauty contest.
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Miss Hooker Miss Hooker competitors aren't actually working girls. Instead, they are sending up typical beauty contest mores by dressing slutty, displaying off-beat talents -- such as frying an egg while stripping -- and competing under names like Ms. Squirt and Ms. One Dolla No Holla.
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Miss Plastic Surgery This started after a woman was kicked out of Miss Beijing for having had plastic surgery. Now, contestants in the Chinese pageant need a note from their doctor confirming that they have had alterations. We heard last year's winner was Kenny Rogers.
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Miss Pregnant We're guessing if any of these lovelies end up pumping out a girl, the poor thing will be on the creepy child beauty pageant circuit the day she is able to stand upright.
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Miss Subway Between 1941 and 1976, Miss Subway was a New York City mass transit staple, with commuters voting on a group of contenders whose posters and biographies were placed inside subway cars. It was brought back in 2004, but then discontinued after becoming infested by rats.
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Miss Transsexual International Not only does the winner get a crown and a cash prize, but she walks away with confirmation that she could probably pull a crying game on most of the male populace.
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Miss Downhome Winning this Canadian beauty contest requires more than just gracefully displaying a large fish while wearing a bikini. Competitors are also tested on their ability to bait a hook and dance a jig to a live fiddler while holding an open, full bottle of beer in each hand.
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International Bottom Championship First place gets $10,000, an underwear modeling contract and, curiously, an insurance policy on her winning asset. Of course, this ensures financial security if the winning backside happens to fall victim to a disfiguring bidet accident.
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Zombie Beauty Contest In this celebration of the undead at Phoenix ComiCon, the most ghoulish, and likely to eat brain is crowned queen.
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Miss Congeniality The Buen Pastor prison in Bogota, Colombia holds an annual beauty pageant for its inmates. The winner receives new clothes and a crown, but no time off for pageant mastery.