You are the Blueberry from Willy Wonka
You just busted my wall down… you bastard
It looks like you’re wearing an inflatable sumo Halloween costume but you’re not
You turned a shirt into a sports-bra
You don’t pop your collar, your collar pops you……(what does that even mean?)
Wat?
Your right foot looks like a big inflated pink condom
You can’t say ‘diet’, but you need to go on one
You make Princess Leia look li… Wait a sec…
Oh, there we go…
For the first time ever, the ‘Official XXL’ on your shirt is smaller than your shirt’s actual size
Your neck has a neck cushion so you can sleep wherever
You are judged even though you’re the judge
Your arm and back together looks like an ass
Your drink only fits on the table once you’ve eaten enough
You weight more than a Kawasaki Ninja
Om nom nom nom nom
You have a gunt
You just don’t fit in…
You’ve been on a safari, as the animal
Your head is… on backwards? wait a sec…
Your legs have tan lines from your stomach blocking the sun
Inanimate objects know what you’re thinking
Your neck is wider than your head
6 girls should, but only 5 girls fit in the picture
Your boobs impair your vision on the road
You look like the Michelin Man
No one can tell if you’re a man or a woman
Your penis is sandwiched between your nuts and stomach
You need help putting on your pants
You weigh more than your motorcycle
Even your unitard has stretch marks
Your stomach hangs out from under your dress
